Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Meet Cross' Critters: Part I: Pinkies, Fuzzies, & Hoppers

Greetings readers!

As the release of Mice Don't Taste Like Chicken approaches, it's time to introduce some of Mr. Cross' classroom critters. Today's guests are Pinkies, Fuzzies, and Hoppers.

Scott: Mr. Hopper, could you please share with our readers the difference between pinkies, fuzzies, and you?

Hopper: I'd be hoppy to! Pinkies, also called kittens, are cocktail weenie-looking babies of white mice. They earn their name from their pink color before their fur grows in. Fuzzies are pinkies with hair and a little larger size. Me, I'm so grown up I hop and race around so reaching 6th grader hands can't catch me.

Scott: How do you spend your time when you're not evading 6th grade grabbing hands?

Hopper: Chewing.....exploring......chewing.....leaving know, same as any other normal mouse.

Scott: Other species have names to identify males and females. What do you call a male mouse and a female mouse?

Fuzzy: Oo-oo! I know this one! I'm a boy, so I'm called a buck. My pinky sister over there is a doe. We're like miniature deer, but with much longer tails.

Scott: Does it anger you when someone picks you up by the tail like this (*scoop*)?

Fuzzy: Hey, cut it out! Put me down! You should never pick up a mouse by its tail. The end could fall off.

Scott: (*plop*) I apologize, I had no idea. One final question for today. If mice don't taste like chicken, then exactly how do they taste?

Hopper: I'll answer this one. Our people were once fried and cooked long ago to cure human ailments like smallpox, whooping cough, measles, stomachaches, and even bed-wetting. Not to mention our place on the food chain in Mr. Cross' classroom. I'll respectfully decline an answer as I want no allusions to our tastiness that we might suffer these same fates in the future.

Scott: Well, I appreciate your time. And now, if you'd please stop gnawing on the microphone, I'll bid you a good day.

Pinkies, Fuzzies, and Hoppers:
Born a blind, pink cocktail wiener,
Nothing sadder has ever been seener,
But when fuzzy I become, I scamper and hop,

Good luck trying to catch me, cause I’ll never stop!

"Live, Learn, Teach"

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